MTV does something right…Try to hide your shock

So I promise I have a new blog coming that will allow you to win prizes, I just haven’t gotten around to it quite yet.  But soon, very very soon!

Now onto the real point of this blog, the MTV show “If You Really Knew Me” which focuses on schools participating in the Challenge Day program.  For those unfamiliar with the program, it is basically designed to get kids to recognize what others go through and to unify a school/community/group based on a mutual respect.  Some exercises include small group discussions where each member starts his/her sharing moment with the phrase “If you really knew me….” and the crossing the line activity.  If you’re lost, fear not, I’m going to provide small examples below.  This television series may be the biggest significant contribution MTV has made to American programming in a decade (The Jersey Shore crew does not count, hate to tell ya!).

Each hour long episode introduces us briefly to the school and its’ major focus problem, cliques, segregation, bullying and cyber bullying, etc.  After the problem is exposed we get introduced to a few students the episode will focus on while still showing the entire group participating.  There is a brief intro from Challenge Day staff and then it is off to sit with your small group (which seemed to be assigned, there for encouraging some mixing and matching with new people).  Small groups focus on the “If You Really Knew Me” activity, which I consider to be something every school should look into as a means to drastically cut down on tension within the school.  This activity allows each person a glimpse into lives of people they may previously have never even talked to and also allows them an opportunity to see what kind of baggage their classmates carry with them every single day.  Some significant revelations thus far include finishing the statements with some of these comments (paraphrased)….”If you really knew me”:

• …You would know I am bullied daily and I can’t focus.
• …You would know I pick on others just to fit in with my friends.
• …You would know that one of my parents left our family 3 years ago and we’ve been trying to rebuild ever since.
• …You would know that I am/have been depressed and have contemplated suicide.
• …You would know I struggled with an eating disorder/drugs/serious illness
• …You would know that I never feel good enough to live up to my parents/schools/life’s expectations.
• …You would know that I am gay and face discrimination not only here but at home.
• …You would know that I hate coming to school because I’m afraid of what mine happen here

Needless to say that is not all of the revelations that have been made but it covers a large portion of them to some degree.  As an adult watching this program, your heart breaks for these kids and you so desperately want to tell them to hang in there and that things will get better.  As an adult watching this program your heart also breaks because you know for some of them that is completely untrue.  However, as a viewer your sense of faith in humanity is restored when you see someone who has never said anything to this person (or in some cases has said hurtful things to them or about them) reaches over and takes that person’s hand as they share.

The second portion that follows the group sessions is the crossing the line activity.  One of the Challenge Day leaders stands and reads statements and if that statement applies to you, then you step across a line drawn on the floor.  It is like one big slice of honesty for the whole group to see and it allows people who felt alone to realize they are not as alone as they thought.  In the first episode I was amazed at how many kids stepped across the line for things that by looking or by hearing them talk, you never would have guesses about them.  Silly me for falling into the trap of judging a book by its’ cover.  I noticed it in the second episode (it may have been in the first too, but I missed it) that they also asked how many of the people who were standing there were responsible or played a role in that person crossing the line.  They don’t ask for a show of hands but the looks on faces and silence speaks volumes.  For example, they ask you to cross the line if you have ever felt picked on, harassed or bullied for your race, gender, weight, sexuality or something else.  Then after the students step over they said “Now think to yourself, how many of you are responsible for one of these people having to cross this line?”  The downcast eyes and shuffling feet say it all.

At the end of the hour we are given quick snippets of the students teaching others what they have learned, whether at a football practice, a school assembly, or a dinner around the kitchen table.  The only thing more I could ask from this show is that it follow up with these schools in a couple months and let us know (honestly) what has changed.  My sincere hope is that thing will be much better in the schools featured.

Ok, wait, two things I could ask from MTV, the second being that they get this program into as many schools as possible.  As grown-ups, parents, educators, mentors and role models, we can only repeat so many times that once you put something out into the world either in person or online or in a text, that you can’t take it back.  I believe that this program provides a more immediate reality check and could solve problems several schools face inside there walls.

The Challenge Day group has provided us with a valuable resource and it is up to us to make sure it is used to its’ full potential.

Just a little something to think about….

Sarah

(To watch “If You Really Knew Me” tune into MTV on Tuesday nights at 11pm Eastern/ 10 pm Central to watch the newest episodes.  You can also visit MTV’s website for additional info on the show.  The link to the Challenge Day program’s website is provided in the blog)